Celebrating You

This International Women’s Day, we got up close and personal with 3 women from all walks to find out what womanhood means to them, and their tips on thriving in today's world.

Anabel Chew
Founder of WeBarre

Goldheart:
Hi Anabel! Happy International Women’s Day! Tell us more about yourself.

Anabel:
Hello! My name is Anabel, also known as the co-founder of the boutique fitness studio WeBarre. For those who don't know, I was a professional musician before starting WeBarre! I played the flute for more than 10 years, from university to teaching professionally and playing in the orchestra.

Goldheart:
Do you have any advice for aspiring female entrepreneurs?

Anabel:
These days I don't like so much to think about myself as a lady boss. I mean, men don't label themselves as man bosses, right? I don’t see the need for a special title as a ‘lady boss’ to separate myself because I am an equal to the men that are around me. I think it's important because, especially now that I have a daughter, I think what we do now sets the tone for when she becomes a working adult in future. It's powerful to be able to set an example for her that, yes, I'm a woman. Yes, I'm a mom, but also, I'm the boss of my company. Just like Dad’s a boss of his company, too!

I want aspiring youth to know that the possibilities are limitless as long as you are willing to dream it and work hard for it. The future is only limited by the boundaries that you put around yourself. There are people that have said - You're an entrepreneur, I want to become an entrepreneur too! But I want to tell them that is really, really hard work. I'm always on the go - for the first few years, even till now, I never really took a break. Not on the day I got married, not after I gave birth to my daughter, Ari. There is no such thing as going on leave because this is your business. That said, entrepreneurship is not the only way. I want to encourage young girls to think limitless. Not everybody needs to be an entrepreneur. You could be an accountant in an accounting firm. That's great! You become the best accountant that you can be.

K-Style Diamond Necklace in Rose Gold

K-Style Diamond Bangle

Goldheart:
Speaking of your daughter, you recently welcomed a little one! How has that experience been for you?

Anabel:
Motherhood has been a big lifestyle change for me. It’s not something I rushed into because I never really identified myself as someone who wanted to become a mother. I had my concerns on whether I would be a good mom because I'm not very maternal by nature. It's difficult and involves a lot of hard work but I must say, it's been a very rewarding journey. I really respect moms, especially working moms who manage to be very involved in their children's lives. It's a really, really hard thing to do.

Goldheart:
What are some of the things you want to instill in Ari during her childhood years and beyond?

Anabel:
I want to remind her every day that she is enough as she is. There are a lot of things that I can teach her, but I would love to instill in her the values that are important to us, as a family. In our family, there are no secrets. In our family, we respect one another. In our family, we listen. These are some of our core values we uphold and together with my husband, we lead by example to instill these values in her.

Goldheart:
How have you yourself been coping with wearing multiple hats, being a business owner and a working mom amongst others?

Anabel:
I feel like every single day of my life is a production! My schedule is packed and there are so many things happening concurrently. With 12 to 16 waking hours each day, and I want to be there for my daughter, especially at this age. I'm very involved in terms of feeding her, putting her to sleep and organizing her schedule while fitting in pockets of time to play with her as much as I can. At the same time, I have to work so WFH has largely been a good thing for me but it's also very distracting. I just try to do as much as I can by prioritizing. For example, If I think of something that I really need to urgently do that I can’t at the moment, I’ll send myself a voice recording on my Apple Watch so the minute she goes down for her nap, I’m back on top of my to-do list. In that sense I find that I'm way more productive now that I'm a mom. Before, I was productive, but I could work for an hour then go for a walk… work for another then go for a coffee… but there's just no time for that right now. Perhaps one good thing that came out of COVID is that now everything can be done online and its way quicker and more productive.

Goldheart:
What about yourself? What do you do to unwind, how do you pamper yourself?

Anabel:
I don't have a lot of time in my day and that's a reality. But I also know that if my tank is empty, I will be running on empty and I won't be able to give my best to Ari, my work, or the people around me. Something that I really prioritize is sleep. This might sound ridiculous, but on days when I'm really tired, I go to bed at 830 or 9pm just to recharge my batteries.

To be honest, you need a certain level of self-esteem once you become a mom! In the first few months, your hair is messy, my skin was the worst it's ever been and now I've got these ridiculous baby hairs from post-partum hair loss… So it really takes a hit on your self-esteem, for sure. I look at old photos and at myself in the mirror now, and sometimes I wish I could do more. Doing this shoot, getting my hair and makeup done, putting on a dress and jewellery really made me feel human again.

K-Style Diamond Earrings

Now I look forward to simple occasions like going out on a date night with my husband and dressing up. I recently took out my engagement ring for the first time in a long while for Chinese New Year because I'm around my baby a lot and I don't want to scratch her. Putting it back on reminded me of the time with my husband before our baby came along. That’s what I love about jewellery - it holds precious memories and serves as a reminder to myself to not forget who I was before. It’s these little things that really pamper me.

Goldheart:
What is the greatest thing that you have taken away from the female community at WeBarre?

Anabel:
Women supporting women. I feel that women are designed to seek out communities. At WeBarre, we try to build a community that is empowering, and it really makes a difference to people's lives. Beyond being just a fitness class, we have women who come in not feeling good about themselves, or unhappy about the way their body looks. We want to provide an environment that is positive, where people are supportive of one another. Something that I’ve taken away is that we are beyond just fitness. It’s in the people that we have crossed paths with, the people that we've helped, and the people that we now know as friends.

Goldheart:
Trivia questions! Do you prefer yoga wear or evening dresses?

Anabel:

Evening dresses and dressing up for sure! I love looking at old photos of like the 20s and 30s, or movies like The Gatsby or Downton Abbey where people used to dress up so nicely. Dressing up is a ritual of its own and I hate that in Singapore, you can go to a hotel and wear like t-shirts shorts, and you can get away with it!

Goldheart:
Are you a earrings or a necklace girl?

Anabel:
Earrings! But I think necklaces are dressier.

Hearts & Starburst Diamond Stud Earrings

Glitz Diamond Necklace

Goldheart:
Diamonds or gold?

Anabel:
That's hard. I used to love gold so much, I would only have gold jewellery. And, my flute is custom-made of solid gold and it holds so much sentimental value. To me gold is precious - whether it's an engraving at the back of a gold ring, or in my case, my flute, which has been with me all my life. And what’s best is that its value appreciates!

Then I received my engagement ring which was my first ever diamond jewellery… and I've just been collecting diamonds ever since! Okay, I can’t choose – both!

Goldheart:
What is your favorite workout to take your mind off things?

Anabel:
WeBarre, surely. Honestly, I wouldn't have created WeBarre if I didn't feel like it's something that I could do every single day. I really believe in it. We have designed the workouts such that when you're doing the exercise, you’re focused and present in the room. It’s my go-to method of destressing. I'm also currently training to become a mindfulness and meditation coach. I just started my course and I'm really excited to see where it goes.

——

Dr Jade Kua
Pediatric Specialist & Life Coach

Goldheart:
Thank you for being one of our special guests this International Women’s Day! Tell us about yourself and what you've been up to lately?

Jade:

Hi I’m Jade, I'm a pediatric emergency specialist. I am a mother to many and a mentor to more, having recently become a professional life coach. I’m also an author.

Goldheart:

Care to share more about your recent projects?

Jade:

I published a book with my dad last year about mindfulness, and another with my daughters about mindful conversations disguised as a bedtime story for children. But like Winnie the Pooh and Peter Pan, they are also for adults who want to journal their thoughts and tackle conversations that they may not normally have. It’s a reminder to always be adventurous, brave and kind. Taking the time to discuss things like hopes and fears, dreams and disappointments is helpful in terms of self-discovery, allowing you to be a little bit more curious about yourself and to dream a little more. The illustrations from within were done by my eight-year-old, so that was a lovely creative project I was very happy to work on. Some other projects including a fashion design collaboration with Ying the Label, called All About Love. And we have another one coming up real soon.

Goldheart:

That sounds really exciting. Being on the frontlines, how was 2020 for you?

Jade:

2020 was pretty big for me, firstly because I’m a frontliner dealing with COVID, and secondly, I was blessed with the opportunity to do all these other projects. I think we had a lot of things to think about, down to how we value our lives. Be it physical health or mental and emotional health, we took time to consider and take stock. What do I want to be remembered for? What can I do? What is significant? Can I do something outside of my own life and family to do something for the larger community? As a frontliner I treat those who are seriously injured or critically ill. But as a coach, my outreach extends to people who may not present with a fever or runny nose, but it doesn’t mean they’re well. They just want to be a better version of themselves, and my job is to partner with them to get there. Before I got certified as a life coach, the book was meant to be a normal illustrated children's book. But COVID happened, I decided that it could be so much more than that. It's become a journal, a time capsule for your thoughts, and an opportunity to have those conversations with somebody. I guess 2020 forced us all, to think a bit more about what we want to do with ourselves. Or you could sit around and be disappointed because we couldn't travel, wanting to erase the year and say it was a bummer, but that's not helpful at all, is it?

916 Gold Knot Ring

916 Gold Knot Necklace

Goldheart:

Was being a life coach something that has always been on your bucket list? How did you get there?

Jade:

For some context, my dad is a psychiatrist. He looks after the mind and is a very patient and extremely kind man. Over the past decade or so, he’s been really pushing for the concept of mindfulness, to the surprise of many because he's both a man of science and a devout Christian. People often associate mindfulness with Buddhism and even yoga, but to him the principles of these things are not religious. The practice of mindfulness is really good for one’s mental-emotional wellbeing.

By contrast, I’m a frontliner dealing with accidents and emergencies. Everything's very fast paced, often I barely have chance to say hello to my patients, I’m fixing broken bones, stitching up bloody wounds. I’m basically George Clooney in that show, ER. People have always asked ‘Oh, wouldn't you like to do something like your dad? Is it because your characters are different?’. No, not really - I would actually enjoy having a nice long conversation with somebody and helping them with something more meaningful than a superficial wound management, specifically in terms of helping them find direction. But I haven't really had an opportunity to do that because the nature of my work which really has nothing much to do with counseling.

I started reading up on traditional medicine like Chinese medicine, Japanese medicine, essential oils, and alternative therapy. There are so many things out there that I cannot claim to be an expert on and things I don't know yet about the human body. I looked around at what I could possibly learn as a mature student, and from a practical standpoint Chinese Medicine wouldn’t have worked as it would take me years. I then came across the idea of being a coach and thought it was both practical and meaningful, so I took the leap to go to school and get certified. My colleagues have been very supportive of me and one of my happiest moments was at a medical conference where I was asked to speak on two topics - one on something very technical, pediatric seizures, and the other about wellness in stressful situations for emergency doctors. I felt extremely honored to be able to share both perspectives.

Goldheart:

Who are some of the inspiring women in your life?

Jade:

Rather than being inspired by people older than me, I'm inspired by my family that's younger than me - my own daughters. Their resilience and patience, being so supportive of me despite my busy work schedule are admirable and really held the family together. So, while it’s common for people to be inspired by their moms and grandmas and teachers, I'm actually inspired by the younger ones. I look at them and often feel like I don't tell them that I appreciate them enough.

Goldheart:

Speaking of your children, do you have tips on raising daughters or even sons, in today's world?

Jade:

People tend to prepare children for success, whatever your notion of success may be. Grooming them to get As in school, getting married and having children, I suppose, is taught most in many cultures. But I feel like it's important to groom them, for how to react to failures. We've all had them, but people don't tend to talk about it. What's in the news, biographies and movies, is always about someone's success and then everyone aspires towards that. Talking about failures openly, I think, is helpful so that they can be resilient and try again, because failure is not the end. It's just part of the journey and equipping them to handle whatever life throws at them. The world is so different now - I don't expect my daughters to aspire towards any of the things that I mentioned at the start. It's really their choice.

Goldheart:

What about yourself? What do you enjoy best about being a woman?

Jade:

I grew up in a time where there was a very strong bias towards men. It's cultural, right? Back then in medical school there was a quota in favor of male candidates for the intake and that was only lifted after I graduated. And as women, we go through stages in our natural lifetime. Our monthly hormonal cycles, childbirth, and the likes. In this sense, in order to thrive, women really have to be mentally strong. I think the wonderful thing about being born into this is that you adapt, learn how to be resilient, and despite all those challenges, figure out how to embrace it.

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Goldheart:

How do you pamper yourself?

Jade:

Plenty of me time. This was something that I learned to do. Previously, I used to give every moment of every day to somebody or something. But in recent years, I've discovered that I need to draw boundaries and do things with just myself. It doesn't make me a better mom, or a better doctor to be constantly giving every bit of my strength away to someone else. And that's really helped me. In fact, that's probably how a lot of my creative projects started out. I might draw, I might write, I might doodle and sometimes they result in something lovely, like a book, for example. Other times it's just doodle and scraps of paper. It doesn't matter other than the fact that it was just the me time that I enjoyed.

Goldheart:

What does fashion and dressing up or accessorizing mean to you?

Jade:

I think it's related to discipline. For many years, I was able to rock the ‘tired doctor’ look and just not bother. Nobody really judged me simply because – I’m a frontliner, and a mum of 6! But sometimes it just takes that discipline to say - you know what? I can take five minutes to put on my eyeliner and think about what I'm gonna wear. By being intentional about presenting yourself nicely, it’s a sign to yourself, not for anyone else, that I'm not overwhelmed. That I can do this. So, the more stressed out the day is going to be, the thicker my eyeliner!

Goldheart:

Are you a city or nature kind of girl?

Jade:

Ah, I need to be near the sea. I enjoy being by the sea whether I'm scuba diving, on a boat, or just by the beach. I find it very restorative.

Goldheart:

Books of film?

Jade:

I want to say books because I write them… but I know that I enjoy films. I enjoy the soundtracks and everything else that come with the experience.

Goldheart:

Diamonds or gold?

Jade:

Wow that’s a hard question! I'm going to say gold. I'm very fascinated by how gemstones and precious metals can be formed in the ground for millions of years and then someone chances upon it, mines it out, cuts, polishes and sets it in jewellery. Suddenly it’s worth hundreds and thousands of dollars! It’s so amazing. But then with gold, it's really managed to achieve something incredible. It's actually a commodity on the stock market, which is a sign that many people have faith in it and agree on the value of it. It's a remarkable sign of human psychology, isn't it?

And in marriage, people gift Si Dian Jin as a symbol of acceptance and tradition which I think is precious and wonderful. My husband is Peranakan, so gold certainly is featured a lot in their jewellery.

Goldheart:

What’s your go-to jewellery choice?

Jade:

Now, it's necklaces, by virtue of the fact that when I wear my earrings, they’re at great risk of being ripped off together with my mask. With rings, I'm washing my hands and sanitizing them more times in a day that you can imagine. So necklaces, certainly.

——

Manda Olivia
Marketeer, Artist & Content Creator

Goldheart:
Hi Amanda, Happy International Women’s Day! Tell us more about yourself.

Amanda:
Hi, I'm Amanda. In my 9-5, I do marketing for a fitness brand and on the sidelines, I like to work on creative projects that inspire me. I’m a creative at heart – it’s where I come alive. So that's where my side hustles come in! I enjoy painting, content creation for brands and fitness.

Goldheart:
Nice! Which aspect do you most enjoy?

Amanda:
At this point in time, I love painting the most. Simply because I was holding the artistic side of myself back for a long time. I started in secondary school and went on to university to pursue a degree in fine arts. But then I stopped painting once I started working, and only picked my brush up again during COVID as a sanity project and realized how much I missed it. So that’s my passion project for now. My obsessions change very fast!

Goldheart:
Is there a message that you're trying to bring out in your art? Where does your inspiration come from?

Amanda:
My inspiration comes from everywhere but predominantly it comes from feelings. A lot of people tell me that when they look at my paintings, they don't necessarily understand what they're looking at, but they understand the feeling behind it. It could be anything from calmness, to doubt or excitement. The feeling is the message.

Nanis Dancing In The Rain Aquamarine Ring

Goldheart:
What do you enjoy about the many hobbies you have?

Amanda:
I love the idea of the flow state. Be it in yoga or in a workout, there's what we call the flow state when you are almost in this trance and movement state where you are one with the flow. Similarly, in painting, this happens in my thought processes where energy is translated not into words, but the canvas before me.

Goldheart:
What do you is the best part of being a woman?

Amanda:
I think its the communities we share, where we are always willing to lend a helping hand. There are so many women who won’t hesitate to support you both emotionally or physically.

Goldheart:
Any advice to your younger self?

Amanda:
Don’t be afraid of what people might think of you. Something I struggled with was others’ perception of me but over the years, I’ve learnt that it’s not something I need to care too much about.

Goldheart:
What does dressing up in accessorizing mean to you?

Amanda:
My first job was in fashion, hence I'm heavily influenced by styling and fashion. That has stuck with me till now because my personal mantra is that I always want to look my best because I represent myself and looking presentable is something that I value. In styling my outfits, I also see it as an extension of my creativity, almost as a way of art.